Being a Better Parent

Words We Remember

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The principal of our elementary school has signs on the wall in the school office with her motto, a quote from
Aristotle: “We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence is not an act but a habit.” While that’s a great “mission statement”, the mere act of having that hanging on the wall (and published in our
school newsletter, proclaimed during morning announcements, etc.) personifies an even stronger truth: We are what we repeatedly say. My memories of that principal may dim as …

Being a Better Parent

Helping our kids vs. “enabling” their bad habits: Sometimes, it’s a balancing act

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For many years, I’ve been on board with the Love & Logic notion that “parents need to
allow kids to make mistakes so that they learn from the consequences, so that they’re better prepared for adulthood and ‘the real world’ ”.  If a child
throws one of their toys in anger and breaks it, either it doesn’t get replaced or they earn money by helping Mommy around the house in order to save money to replace it, and …

Being a Better Parent

Time to Clock Out and Chill Out

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Yesterday when she got home from school, Allison said she needed either Andy or I to help her memorize a duet
scene she was scheduled to perform in theatre class today. She needed one of us to act out one part while she acted out her part. I was happy she would even consider me to do this since Andy
usually helps out with “homework” after dinner while I work on miscellaneous chores, like going through mail or putting sheets in the dryer– …

Being a Better Parent, Kids and school

Geek Phobia– Can We Get A Vaccine, Please?

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America has a lot of long-time, embarrassingly idiotic attitudes, stereotypes and prejudices about a lot of things
that make us the laughing stock of the world, and no where is this seen more acutely than in jr. high and high school.   For example, what total
no-brain started the attitude, so many years ago, that athletic ability rules and that having any kind of smarts or artistic talent is considered geeky? Probably someone who ended up spending
their life on …

Being a Better Parent

The Blind Side’s Michael Oher Needs Glasses

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I recently caught a snippet of a TV interview with Leanne Tuohy, the real-life mom portrayed by
Sandra Bullock in the movie, “The Blind Side”.   I was impressed and moved by this movie, which tells the true story of a well-to-do family from Memphis
who adopts a teen (Michael Oher) from the projects.   Among the many things they do for him, they help him feel loved and needed, and help him improve

Being a Better Parent

Defining a Mom’s “Brand”

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I’ll bet I’m not the only Mom whose family is hard-pressed to figure out what to get her each year for holidays and birthdays. I mean, think about it—Moms are usually pretty good at picking up on all sorts of clues and being the “gatherers”, getting gifts for everyone else, sometimes even stockpiling them in a special closet or drawer throughout the year– but leaving few clues about themselves. And let’s face it, since husbands and kids aren’t always very astute gatherers, they need really obvious clues. Like a wish list. But some years I can’t think of much to put on a list. And sometimes, don’t you wish they could just figure it out on their own?
I realized recently that I don’t make that an easy task. Since Mom is always serving others, self too often gets left behind. For example, do my kids really have any idea what kind of music I like? When they’re in my car, I let them listen to their favorite radio stations. But when they’re in my husband’s car, does he? Rarely. Instead, they listen to sports talk radio, and CDs like The Rolling Stones, Bruce Springsteen, U2…

Being a Better Parent, Raising Teenagers

Whose Room Is It, Anyway?

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Amid all the news hysteria yesterday about the runaway balloon over Denver and the possible 6-year-old pilot on board, another news story about another Colorado family quietly got my attention: the mother of one of the Columbine High School shooters has broken her 10-year silence. In an essay for O magazine (naturally), Susan Klebold reveals the constant guilt she’s felt over the years, the many letters she’s written to victims’ families, the shock over finding out her son had been suicidal and wasn’t necessarily looking forward to prom like she’d thought. “We didn’t know that he and Eric had assembled an arsenal of explosives and guns,” Susan Klebold wrote. My heart goes out to her and any parent who has lost a child. Her experience and those of others whose children have led a secret life are a wakeup call to parents on many issues, one being “privacy and kids”. The idea that a kid’s room is his “private sanctity” is heinous.

Being a Better Parent, Raising Teenagers

Life-Changing Moments

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Did anyone see the million dollar hole-in-one golf video going around on the Internet last week? Jason Hargett, a restaurant manager from Provo, Utah, decided to enter a charity golf tournament in spite of a hurt wrist, using his brother’s clubs. As in many charity tournaments, each hole is sponsored by a business or organization and often there are prizes for that rare possibility of a hole-in-one. This video shows the shot and his reaction after he makes it.  It’s fun to watch because you can just feel the joy leaping out of your computer screen. …

Being a Better Parent, Humor

Yes Days

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Our pastor, whose children are grown, was telling those of us in his Sunday School class a couple weeks ago that he used to have “Yes” days with his kids– a day once in awhile where Dad would say yes to every request.  “What kinds of things did they ask for?” I asked him. “Oh, it usually involved ice cream,” he said.  “We’d go for ice cream a couple of times in one day.”
How fun, I thought, but if I tried that with my kids, I think I’d be broke pretty quick. No, make that, I know I’d be broke pretty …