UncoolMom.com: Recent Comments

Comment on Continuously Contagious

Keri — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 04:08:32 GMT

Daniel Goleman's book "Social Intelligence" talks about the neuro - biological basis of our need to connect with others, the influence we have on others & they have upon us. Thanks for introducing the topic...so much more than "positive peer pressue," since the influences can be incredibly subtle.

Comment on The Dreaded "B" Word

uncoolmomphase2 — Mon, 08 Mar 2010 14:31:00 GMT

Did you keep your hair this weekend?
Good luck with your budget. Keep in mind that it just isn't that tangible to a teenager. Make it real.
Gotta few suggestions for you:
1. Get a map, a phone, a good web browser, your daughter, and a good bribe. Sit down without distractions (just the two of you) and plot out a journey to consignment stores within a five mile radius of your house. Make it a mother/daughter extravaganza, complete with coffee or lemonade or breakfast (or whatever you two can agree on) somewhere in the middle of the search. Hit at least three to five stores. This will take time. I recommend no hurrying. Give her, say, $50 or less. Let her go through the racks by herself. Let her find a good deal that she really likes.She won't like anything on the first run. Next week, go to her favorite mall. Give her fifty dollars. Let her look. Have that lemonade and be really pleasant. Repeat process periodically. She WILL get hooked, guaranteed. Find a way for her to make fifty dollars. Babysitting, washing cars, mowing the lawn, vacuuming, mending, (NOT cleaning her room.) It has to be HER money, earned with her effort, a.k.a. blood, sweat and tears. Give her an extra $25. So now she has $75 to spend (have an occasion to shop for, like a dance or a special night out.) Let her pick the stores she goes to. It may take some time, but pretty soon guess which stores she will ask to visit...and then she might also figure out the sale cycles at the mall...it has to be HER idea, not your mandate.
Now, I had some really huge success by complementing these forays with sewing some stuff at home. We picked out patterns and fabric together, and then she really started to appreciate the value of the work that went into clothing. Eventually she started to compare the difference in quality as well as trend. She decided to learn to sew, and even spent her own money buying a machine, patterns and fabric. She is proud of what she can make herself. She loves to be fashionable, and she loves her sense of identity in doing it.
I know I got this idea from my mom, who grew up in the Depression. She got it from her great-grandma, who was an immigrant to this country. It's the good old-fashioned American way.
I think it worked.
Guess what...she will start comparison shopping...she will do the math...and when she realizes she can buy what she really likes for three nights of running after the neighbor's toddlers (at the mall) or she can buy one or two outfits on one night's pay, if she shops savvy. It has to be her choices, so if it is a "different look", just let it be.
While making these shopping runs a treat for the two of you, you can actually engage in female type conversation. There are these hormonal days that you just have to endure together.

Comment on The Dreaded "B" Word

Keri — Sat, 06 Mar 2010 13:51:21 GMT

Uncool mom, you rock! Learning the value of money is so important for our kids. Thanks for sharing.

Comment on Punch-drunk on Punch Cards

uncoolmomphase2 — Fri, 05 Mar 2010 17:52:26 GMT

An update on Phase2:
After weeks, I have not made progress turning my daughter’s bedroom into my personal haven. I blog to confess. I just don’t have the guts to throw out the tutu, the mum, or the Invention Convention trophy. They might need to stay. What to do, Uncool Mom? I called my daughter to make sure she really didn’t want these things; she said, “Mom, I really don’t care, but you should hang on to Darlene” (her doll.) Maybe the T-shirt quilt would be therapeutic. At least there isn’t any dog hair.
Oh, yeah, about that wallet. I got a new one. It’s in great condition—there’s not a whole lot in it. My memory box, however, is full.

Comment on Punch-drunk on Punch Cards

uncoolmomphase2 — Fri, 05 Mar 2010 17:50:00 GMT

Fellow uncool mom here supporting your indulgent whine with empathy. I SOOO get it. Get prepared. One day, your wallet will no longer bulge. First, there is college. Your wallet will dry up. Every time you see your credit card, you will flinch. Groceries will be dear. My card-carrying days are waning, thanks to graduation. I still have a few: drugstore, grocery, and discount breadstore card. I buy day-old bread now: saves a few bucks. Luckily, I don’t need a card for Salvation Army.
I keep my old wallet, ripped out seams and all, as a memento of days gone by. The punch cards are in there with old receipts and to-do lists from my youth as an uncool high-school mom. They are in a box of “stuff I couldn’t part with” when my daughters went to college. Each daughter has their own box of “stuff.” Four years have gone by, and each year they take out their own box, tinker with the contents, throw out “trash” and keep the “good stuff.” The “just had to have” outfit from 10th grade (cost $$$ and sent my punch card to platinum status) was the first to go, but the team towels and band shirts stayed (“Mom, let’s make a quilt.”)
This year my oldest daughter graduated from college, moved for a full time job and took her "stuff" with her. I went to reclaim her room: maybe a craft room, a nice guest room, or maybe just open space. (I’m thinking: Yoga on the rug without dog hair. Soft music while writing a friend. Space to occupy without guilt or hearing the dishwasher.) I approached these prospects with glee. Trash bag and vacuum in hand, I entered my daughter’s room cautiously. I had always kept honored their private space. Despite the move, the room was hardly empty. The closet was still full. The furniture was gone, but piles of stuff and dust fluffs remained, just as she had left them. She had told me that whatever was left I could throw or give away, or keep as I wished.
Recall your punch cards. Like an archeologist, I studied the remains (oh, how my Master Card had bled), Among piles of clothes, underwear and shoes that didn’t fit, were worn out, or didn’t rate, the trappings of high school days were now starkly visible. The Homecoming mum was still hanging in the closet, with the prom dress, high heels and matching bag. In the corner, her favorite doll, tattered and threadbare from babyhood, was wrapped securely in its blanket. Her first ballet tutu and little pink shoes from age 6 were behind the formals. Along with those, the confirmation dress from age 13, the Invention Convention trophy from 8th grade, her cast from her broken leg in 9th grade, and her senior medals were all there. I found old class notes, ticket stubs, friends’ pictures, unmated socks, candy wrappers and dried up nail polish. The team t-shirts were bundled, ready to tackle as my next craft project. Her worn out track shoes and swimsuits filled the closet floor (I recalled the credit card bills:“*sigh*”.) Funny, I never thought of my old wallet, even though I still have it.

Comment on Freebie Friday- OxiClean Contest

Beth — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 03:57:54 GMT

Well, it all started last October when Groupon.com had a "Deal of the Day" I couldn't pass up. It was for Cousins Paintball in Forney, Texas. Not only was it a great deal, but it was also an answer for the question, "What am I going to get my husband for Christmas?" I contacted a couple of wives of friends of his and wha-lah...we had our Christmas present wrapped up. A paintball fight with 12 of his friends and the biggest kid of all in my house was very happy! The event actually didn't occur until this last weekend and when he came home from his big adventure I wondered how in the world the paint would come off of his camo attire. No stain fighters were used and his clothes are as good as new....now if only the mud stains from my 6 year old's soccer practice would have come out...and I treated those. Who new...paint ball stains are easier to fight than mud stains....

Comment on Scenes From A School Talent Show

Louis — Wed, 24 Feb 2010 17:57:37 GMT

Thanks - I was wondering what the story was behind the giant remote control. I think it filled in great during the dead time between acts, with so many props having to be moved into place. (My 4 year old loved it!) Again, thank you for your tireless efforts helping to put on the talent show. (one little correction - the I Dream of Jeannie routine was a 4th grade act)

Comment on The Parental Power in Being a Bookworm

Uncool Mom — Thu, 18 Feb 2010 20:21:05 GMT

I knew I would hear from knitters! Thanks for reminding us, Jen, that just about any "portable hobby" is great for parents.

Comment on Geek Phobia-- Can We Get A Vaccine, Please?

Melissa — Thu, 18 Feb 2010 19:33:26 GMT

Thanks for posting this. I was in theater, speech team and choir in high school. I loved all those experiences. I may have been a "geek" back then regardless of what activities I was in, but I knew who my real friends were in the end. I think it shaped me overall.

Comment on The Parental Power in Being a Bookworm

Uncool Mom — Thu, 18 Feb 2010 19:18:08 GMT

Yes, Keri, I should have mentioned that I, too, usually only listen to an audiobook when I'm alone in the car-- otherwise, I have to put up with endless teasing from Emmie as she imitates the various narrators! Also, as you know, driving with kids is good "talk time"-- I wouldn't want an audiobook to replace those great conversations!